When you think about ‘what do men want in a relationship‘, you might start to feel that even though that old phrase “men are from Mars, women are from Venus” started off as a bit of a joke, it definitely has a ring of truth to it. Actually, you might think that as you spend more time in relationships and with men in general, the more accurate this description seems to be!
So what’s the deal?! Why is it that men and women’s brains work so differently that it sometimes seems impossible to make relationships work? What makes this puzzle even more confusing is that, even if some people don’t admit it, we’re all actually chasing the same thing.
Turns Out We All Want The Same Thing!
The majority of men and women all want (at some point in our life anyway) to be in a loving, secure relationship, to spend time around someone who understands us and cares about us, and is looking out for our best interests by helping us grow as we go through life.
So if men and women want the same thing in a relationship, why do we each go about it so differently? Why are so many women left struggling with the question, what do men want in a relationship?
Male Emotions Are Playing It Safe
It’s a common idea that some men are tricky to understand in a relationship because of the very core of their emotions. The differences between the way men and women deal with their feelings and communicate seem to be never-ending! Obviously you’ve noticed that the way your girlfriends talk to you is often completely different to the way your partner does. When women talk with each other, we find it much easier to talk about how we’re feeling than men do.
This is one of those things that have evolved over time to be a very effective defense mechanism. Thousands of years ago when women were back in the caves talking about emotions and how we were feeling (and getting pretty good at it!) the men were out hunting the food… and only managing the occasional grunt to each other 😛 So this is the way that the male brain has managed to work – to avoid any emotional consequences, and keep conversations a lot ‘safer’. It just so happens that this is the same pattern men use when they speak to women today.
A comforting thing is that, even though men can be short with women about how they’re feeling, they often don’t mean to be blunt or mean – this is just simply how their mind wants to respond. To not mention emotions and feelings helps guard them against any emotional damage, but it certainly doesn’t mean that men don’t care.
How Can You Figure Out What He Means?
The great news is that there is light at the end of the tunnel! As we’ve just discussed, men aren’t great at discussing their emotions and sharing their feelings with words. So instead, if you’re figuring out what do men want in a relationship, you’ll be much more effective if you start looking for other clues…
The biggest secret I want to let you in on is that if you start looking at your partners actions, voice tone, and especially his body language – you’ll be able to figure out much more about his true feelings than trying to decode the words he’s using.
This means that as long as you take the things he says combined with his body language and other cues – you’re going to be on a much better track to figuring out not only your partner but also the relationship between the two of you!
Some Extra Helpful Secret Sauce…
So hopefully that first step has given you some new ideas that you can use to improve your relationship and even to ‘read your partners mind’ (as long as you don’t tell him where you got these tips :P).
If you want some more help improving your relationship, and even to learn some neat ‘ninja’ techniques that you can use to give your romance a bit of a boost, then I’ve got a great guide you should check out… you like awesome techniques, right? Good 😀
Well this professional counselor, Bob Grant, has been helping couples improve their relationships for 16 years! But the key part is that most of his clients are women who want to understand men better… sound interesting?
Not only that but he’s got some great tips for you that you should check out, so that YOU can learn how be the kind of woman that men are scared to be without. Click here now to have a look!
As always feel free to leave a comment or question below, and I’ll talk to you soon 🙂
Amber